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Ok So Here’s The Thing..

my boyfriend and i have been going out since september, and we haven’t done a lot. he’s only fingered me i wanna say, three times, and i havent really giving him anything. only a pathetic hand job because i got really nervous and havent dont that before. but we’ve talked about it so much. he’s not a virgin and he only did it once but regrets it beacuse she didnt really love him and he feels like he really loved her but was pressured into doing it. he has asked me to have sex with him before..im still a virgin, in a way, and cant really decide on when i want to do it. we’ve talked about it, and it seems like it’s the ONLY thing we talk about. we want to have sex, and i ask him when, and his “very original” answer is “whenever you’re ready baby”

i cant really decide on when i want to because i’m kinda scared to do it. i don’t want to have a baby or have to deal with a weird disease. i love this boy and i’m completely open and not shy when it comed to telling him no, but.. i want to start saying yes. i dont plan to do it within the next few years, but my plans are always altered somehow, someway and i know when i leave for college in 3 1/2 years, i probably not so sure if it but probably will not be a virgin.. but i want to make sure i, myself, will be ok and not regret anything

so heres my question since i’ve given you a butt load (wow that can sound so wrong) of “background”, will our first time be worth the wait?

i have asked him this quesion. actually i asked him yesterday and he said that we should do when im ready, hinting that he is ready. he said that it would be fun our first time. but i think its complicated.. my boyfriend and i are

wanting to have sex but want it to be romantic.. which is a good thing.. i think..?

i want to be able to wake up the next morning and kiss him while hes still sleeping, maybe hold his hand, play with his curly hair, and just you know, be cute.

so ya hit me up with all the advice you can think of, please because i sure could use it

ok, all the advice except for the “grammar & spelling” i wrote this from my cell phone and its kinda slow!